A Bad Year for Romance

This hasn't been a good year for thinking about romance. Since my wife passed away, the furthest thing from my mind has been romance. I joined a Facebook support group about widows and widowers, and I notices that a lot of people in the group seem to be looking for someone to fill the void of a spouse's death. I established a Facebook friendship with several members but not for the purpose of locating a mate. I just wanted to see how others cope with the death of a spouse.

Occasionally, as I drive around, I'll listen to an oldies station that plays predominantly romantic music of my and my wife's early years and marriage. And the songs remind me how much I love her and the movies we often went to, like Love is a Many Splendored Thing, but sometimes my thoughts of the two of us together would remind me that she is gone forever from my Earthly life.

It has been ten months now. In the beginning, I spent my time with my family elsewhere. That helped a little to keep my mind away from myself. Perhaps eventually I'll think about romance, but for now, it's the furthest thing from my mind.

The Holiday Season Will be Lonely This Year

Without my wife, who passed away six months ago, the holiday season doesn't hold the meaning for me of past seasons. This is an empty time, devoid of happiness, filled with sadness. Certainly, there are no thoughts of romance in my mind and no feelings in my heart.

Yes, I have family, but, still, my beloved gave me courage and optimism. She was my courage and my heart. Without her, I am indecisive, hesitant, and fearful.

There were better times. My memories are filled with this beautiful young girl smiling as she walked toward me or caught my eye from a distance when we were separated by several aisles in a large department store.

We loved shopping for gifts for our children, taking great care to have an equal number and quality of Christmas presents for each on Christmas morning.

We enjoyed sitting across from one another in a booth in our favorite restaurant, having breakfast, drinking coffee, and talking.

There are so many more memories. I'll leave now. Remembering brings tears and sadness.